finding your place in the story

story

Written by KrisCamealy

As a sequin-wearing, homeschooling, mops-coordinating mother of four, Kris Camealy is passionate about Jesus and her family. Her heart beats to share the hard, but glorious truth about  life in Christ with anyone who will listen. When she's not writing, she gobbles up books like they're going out of print and plays in the kitchen. She's been known to take gratuitous pictures of her culinary creations, causing mouths to water all across Instagram. Once upon a time, she ran 10 miles for Compassion International, a ministry for which she serves as an advocate. You can read more of her heart-words in her new book, Holey, Wholly, Holy: A Lenten Journey of Refinement, and on her blog Kris Camealy.com.

June 24, 2013

Gathering the basket loaded with damp clothes and towels, I step out onto the patio.  I stepped out barefoot knowing the risks, as stray twigs and abandoned bubble wands press into the soles of my feet.

story

The path ahead is sketchier than the first few steps as I must first cross the mulch, then pick my way carefully through piles the dog has left behind. My toes seek out the paving stones that bridge the mulch, still, I manage to find an errant wood chip or two with the soft spot of my arch. Wincing, I notice it, but I go on. It’s not the first time, nor doubtfully the last.

Resting the basket in the grass, I stretch the line from one side of the fence, around the pulley and across to the other side where it’s anchored. I breathe deeper out here, with the summer sun warming my shoulders and a slight breeze against my cheek. I hang the laundry in my bare feet because honestly–maybe this sounds crazy–it feels like Holy work. The yard there under the clothesline feels like sacred ground, somehow different from the sidewalk by the mailbox, or the patch of grass by the gate.

clothesline

This same feeling settles over me every single time I do this–shaking out, pinning, sliding on down the line. As I hang my baby’s nightgown I realize how small she still is. I am reminded that she is only 3. Hanging my boys  shorts I notice the small stains from their outdoor excursions and the spaghetti we ate a couple of nights back.

I notice not only where my children are in this life but also the loss of the days already past. Marilynne Robinson wrote that “memory is the sense of loss, and loss pulls us after it”. I feel that pull in hanging it all out.  I rejoice and grieve a little each time I choose this work. I rejoice for the days yet to come, and selfishly, for my husband’s work shirts and slacks that dry nearly wrinkle-free on the line. In choosing this work, I gain a small freedom from the iron.

clothesline

I know how small these menial thoughts are that drift through my mind as I shake, pin, repeat. It’s a task that can be done without thought and so my mind is freer here to go to other places. God never fails to meet me in the yard, at the clothesline. I find in this ancient practice, a connection to a past I haven’t known. I imagine Mary hanging out Jesus’s worn tunic after he’s spent a day out among the rabble. Perhaps Martha huffed and stewed while she did it; while Mary kicked back in the shade to hear a story from her neighbor.

I don’t know what it looked like for ancient women to do their laundry, or if any of them felt nostalgic about it the way I do. I wonder if the luxury of my life affords me a certain whimsy, that those who do this out of necessity, rather than choice, simply don’t or didn’t experience.

clothesline

I don’t know why it matters to me at all, except that somehow, hanging it all out to dry roots me in some way to a history that is part of my very beginning.

As I hang the clothes and watch the sun glint through the fabric, I see the way Christ shines through my life. Though I may have damp, wrinkled seasons, His gentle, daily washing of me makes me clean again and again–and again. His love strings me out and leaves me warming in the sun. His breath in me helps my wrinkles to release. The creases are mostly gone after I’ve been hung out to dry. Even when shadow stains remain, I am renewed.

clothesline

The clothesline at the back of the yard grounds me to the everyday monotony of a housekeeping practice that’s been performed for centuries. The work goes on without end, but I find this work simultaneously mindless and intentional.

I own a dryer, yet some days, I make the choice to take it outside. The work places me firmly inside of a bigger story still unfolding. We’re building a life here, these, the uniform of our days.

I choose the work because I am blessed by the process. I remember my role in this story–woman, mother, wife, follower of the One who has laid the foundation, and sister to the women who have come before, whose hands have held the wrinkles of life and learned to let the Spirit do the work.

17 Comments

  1. Linda Stoll

    Thank you, Kris, for a lovely start to what will be a very ordinary day, filled with tasks that make life and home and sanity and routine and holy all meld together. An offering of worship, yes?

    Reply
    • Kris Camealy

      I so feel this today, Linda, how it all melds together. Praying for your day to glisten with the beauty of the mundane and not-so-ordinary all at once!

      Reply
  2. kelli woodford

    “Placed firmly inside a bigger story that’s still unfolding.”
    yes. anything that takes my hand and leads me to that revelation is worth all the pricks of mulch and sweat gathering on my brow that often come with such excursions.

    Holy Ground, indeed.
    thank you, Kris. love this.

    Reply
    • Kris Camealy

      Yes, indeed, Kelli. It’s worth the walk and the work to find the sacred amid the ordinary. It’s been a morning of remembering this again and agin. Thanks, sweet friend.

      Reply
    • Kris Camealy

      Thank you, Eileen!

      Reply
  3. Guest

    Beautiful writing.

    It reminds me of the book “1,000 Gifts” by Ann Voskamp. Read it if you have time.

    Finding God in the mundane is a practice so much like worship, it causes us to slow down and truly, as you put it, find yourself in His presence.

    Reply
  4. Claire Florine

    Beautiful writing.

    It reminds me of the book “1,000 Gifts” by Ann Voskamp. Read it if you have time.

    Finding God in the mundane is a practice so much like worship, it causes us to slow down and truly, as you put it, find yourself in His presence.

    Reply
    • Kris Camealy

      Claire, 😉 I have read Ann’s book, and continue to treasure the wisdom of her words. I am continually learning to move slower, to wait and watch. Thanks for reading and saying hi!

      Reply
      • Claire Florine

        I’m so glad you’ve read it! I keep recommending it to people I know. Thanks for posting!

        Reply
  5. Tonya

    Oh I love this. I too take comfort in the task of laundry. Especially when we come home after holidays and there are piles of it littering the basement and all I can see are lazy days and with no schedules – a holiday well played. There is something soothing in the task and it makes me miss my clothesline. I just love how you showed us Jesus in your laundry… Thank you friend – it is always a blessing to read your words.

    Reply
    • Kris Camealy

      Bless you, Tonya. Laundry and I have a bit of a tumultuous relationship, LOL. But I am learning, albeit slowly, to appreciate the work–to let the work be worship.

      Reply
  6. Shelly Miller

    The thing about this I love, is that you give me perspective and remind me of what is important. That we truly are tied to those who paved the way before us. They did the same mundane tasks we do, but it’s a choice about how we see them. This is holy work indeed.

    Reply
    • Kris Camealy

      Thanks, Shelly. There are days, so many days when I forget how Holy the mundane and ordinary can be–like I’m always imagining it to glow and shine. The truth is instead that the holy is lowly. Less shiny, and much easier to overlook. God help me. May I learn this forever.

      Reply
  7. Cara Sexton

    Oh, Kris. Selfishly glad I read this on laundry day in the Sexton household. Thank you for slowing me down just now, for walking me to a quiet holy place and letting me watch this. Your bare feet on holy ground is pure beauty, friend. Thanks for inviting us to the worship.

    Reply
    • Kris Camealy

      I’m so glad this crazy thing could encourage you, Cara. Thanks for encouraging me!!XO

      Reply
  8. Amy L. Sullivan

    Love you, Kris. For your post, your pics, and your heart.

    Reply

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finding your place in the story

by KrisCamealy time to read: 4 min
18