from jeans to scrubs [when life serves a 180]

Written by Duane Scott

GENERAL EDITOR I'm a writer, nature lover, a friend, a singer (in the shower), a Cheetos lover and a Snuggie hater. And God and I are buddies.

August 18, 2011

I hang my hand out the window, doing the airplane as I drive through the gravel roads of Iowa. The old farm truck I sit in doesn’t have air conditioning, but the evening is cool enough that it doesn’t bother me. My jeans have holes in them, and when I look down, I notice there is blood on my leg, probably coming from the finger I hurt while loading the air compressor. I hang it out the window to dry.

This is who I am. I love the country lifestyle. I’ve even been called a “classy redneck” from time to time.

“Your life is about to make a 180, Duane… are you sure you’re ready for that?” my Dad asks me.

Glancing over, I look at him and he looks at me, and we both know I’m probably not ready (how could anyone be), but I’m willing to walk in faith.

Because this coming Monday, I’ll trade my country lifestyle for a large stack of medical textbooks. Instead of wearing faded blue jeans, I’ll be wearing scrubs and sometimes, a suit and tie.

I glance out the window, watching the cornfields float by, lost in thought.

“This is where you stop me, God,” I tell Him and I feel rude, almost accusatory to Him, but I continue, “This is the exact point where you’ve stopped me in the past. What’s it going to be this time? Cancer? A car wreck? (I hold my hands at 2 and 10 o’clock.) A family member’s death?”

I spew ugly. And immediately, I feel guilty because over the past year, every blessing I didn’t deserve has been given to me and here I am, doubting God’s intentions.

“All things work together for good,” my dad reminds me.

I shrug. “Maybe. Then why is it actually going to happen this time? Why is God allowing me my dream?”

Silence fills the truck. I watch the wind turbines circle around and around, casting long shadows across the soy bean fields.

“…for those who love God,” I whisper, finishing the well-known scripture.

My heart quiets.
My resolve shatters.

Because that is what is different this time around. This time, I love God. I really do.

And I become willing for His love in return to be poured all over my life.

34 Comments

  1. Crystal Rowe

    Duane, this is a really beautiful post. Thank you for your honesty and transparency.

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      Thanks @soulmunchies:disqus ! 🙂 

      Reply
  2. Allen Madding

    Duane,
    For years I pursued my dreams without any thought to what God’s will was for my life. I successfully found unhappiness. You can trust that if he has opened a door, he has purpose and will complete the good work he has begun.

    Over the last 11 years I have missed living in the country and grown tired of the traffic in the biggest city in the South, but I know I am where I am supposed to be at this moment.

    I am excited what God has in store for you. I will be praying for your journey.

    -Peace
    Allen

    Reply
    • Crystal Rowe

      Allen – dude – what a small world the blogosphere is … good to see you as a part of this community!!  

      ~Crystal

      Reply
      • Allen Madding

        Awesomeness, Crystal. Talk Dave into volunteering for the Habitat build Oct. 8 🙂

        Reply
    • Duane Scott

      @320388126b8ca5826cf1d3f9d56da366:disqus … “I successfully found unhappiness.” 

      I know. I know, brother. It’s sad, but true. 

      Sometime you’ll have to tell me about your journey. I’d be intrigued to know what caused you to move to the city and what you’re doing there. 

      @soulmunchies:disqus … you and Allen know each other? How cool! 

      Reply
      • Allen Madding

        Duane – Really long story, but with an Information Technology career, the job markets pretty small in rural South GA.

        -Peace

        Reply
        • Duane Scott

          That does make sense, Allen.

          Wishing you the best!

          Reply
  3. Sandy

    Touching. Beautiful. Very exciting!

    Reply
  4. brownper8

    This is so nice. I cannot wait to be able to connect with God again. To get to the point where I can just ‘be still and know…..’ Please visit my very new blog if you can http://ngupers.blogspot.com/.

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      Why wait to connect to God? 

      Reply
  5. Anonymous

    He didn’t allow one of the dreams to make another one come true (the one I didn’t even suspect was coming). 

    I hope the other dream I have – He will not stop me… although He has been stalling the process… 

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      That’s so true, @zenichka:disqus . I used to be very focused on school and career and would never have taken the time to marry SG had God not given me the time. 🙂 

      Reply
  6. Eileen

    Duane,  those thoughts you’ve had are so familiar.  When things seemed to start falling into place a few years ago for me it was almost too much to believe.  And, I know it was because I was finally willing to trust and obey Him with all the details in my life.  Someone once told me that obedience leads to blessing.  I know this doesn’t mean we wont continue to experience pain or disappointment but I do think when we finally turn a corner in our faith God LOVES to show us how much He loves us!   Happy for you, Duane. 🙂

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      @a862f307ee4f0079e834ea1f8d567ccc:disqus … tell me something. What is it in your life that you finally decided things were starting to “fall into place”? 

      I’m curious. For me, it’s being able to attend a very prestigious college and to get my RN license (we’ll see from there) but I’m curious what it is for other people. 🙂 

      Reply
      • Eileen

        My falling into place experience was different.  I spent years, years pursuing what I wanted and not what God wanted.  This falling into place came after I lost everything and had to start completely over when I was 28 years old.  But, the best thing that came out of this loss was knowing how desperately I needed Him to guide me.  I refused to settle for things or pursue things with that stubborn “This is what I want” attitude.  That didn’t work out very good for me.  Things started falling into place when I let go.  God provided a great paying job for me to get back on my feet, led me to an amazing church, helped me to surrender an addiction (Almost 10yrs sober) and the icing on the cake…brought a beautiful Christian man (now hubby)into my life (been married almost 9 years).  All this falling into place happened in my life within a span of less than 2yrs!   

        Reply
        • Duane Scott

          Wow.

          So you DO know what it feels like!

          I’m so proud of you. 10 years sober? That’s amazing.

          I like to think that God one day just says, “Eileen, I’m gonna help ya out a little here.”

          And within moments, things are better and getting better.

          That’s how it happened with me. 🙂

          Reply
  7. Jason Wert

    I’m really glad that the doors are finally flying open for you, man.

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      Thanks @jcwert:disqus ! 🙂 You are a blessing. 

      Reply
  8. Keri

    I just really hope that your new venture doesn’t take away too much time from blogging.  #selfishthoughts

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      @popparables:disqus … It’s all good. I’m going to cut back to 2-3 times a week and it makes me sad. 

      But on the plus side, you’ll be able to keep up with my blog! 🙂 

      Reply
  9. Arnyslight

    Duane…

    Amazing.

    Reply
  10. Cindy Holman

    Wow – that IS a change of direction!  YOU GO!  I think scary is sometimes the greatest thing that can happen to us!  I think you will be great 🙂

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      Thanks for the vote of confidence @openid-94174:disqus … What do you do for a job? 

      Reply
  11. Loren Pinilis

    Country boys represent! Heh.
    You’ve done a great job of highlighting that it’s our motives that matter as much as our actions.

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      Loren, Are you a country boy too?

      Let’s do this. 🙂

      Reply
  12. Connie@raise your eyes

    Hmmm….going to med school and you’ll have brain power left to blog? You must be young!

    Reply
    • Duane Scott

      I’m 22. Will that work?

      Reply
      • Connie@raise your eyes

        Ha! If you’re REALLY 22, you can probably pull it off 🙂

        Reply
        • Duane Scott

          Yep! I am. Born in ’89….

          Reply
          • Connie@raise your eyes

            Well then…looking forward to how med school and blogging is going!

  13. Nascardad

    Congratulations,

    The peace and purpose started flowing for me, Nov. 27, 2005 when I confessed to my wife of then ten years that pornography had been my stumbling sin since I was 14.

    It was easy (understatement of the year), but we put our marriage back together and have never looked back. God is faithful.

    I had left full time ministry a year and a half earlier. I now work as a pharmaceutical rep. Not my dream, but definitely exactly where God wants me for now. The cool thing is I have probably done as much or more ministry in the last five years as I did when I was a youth pastor. This time I have been able to do it with a clean conscience and heart.

    God is Faithful!

    Reply
    • Nascardad

      I meant to say, “it wasn’t easy.”

      Reply
  14. Jennifer@GDWJ

    That love for God? It shows. It just does.

    (P.S. — I love the Iowa imagery in your posts lately.)

    Reply

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from jeans to scrubs [when life serves a 180]

by Duane Scott time to read: 2 min
35