how (and when) to talk to the kids about sex [#ICSEX]

Written by Dan King

Christ-follower. husband. father. author of the unlikely missionary: from pew-warmer to poverty-fighter. co-author of activist faith: from him and for him. director of family ministry at st. edward's episcopal church. president of fistbump media, llc.

September 23, 2010

It’s one of the most difficult things that any of will likely ever have to do as a parent…  the dreaded ‘sex talk’.

I don’t think that my parents ever actually gave me one. As a result, I learned most of what I know about sex from friends, TV, and umm… magazines. I don’t know about you, but I’m not sure that Penthouse letters was really the best way for an impressionable youth to discover and explore sex. It’s such a twisted way to learn about something that God intended to be very different than what people were turning it into.

As a result of my experience, I’m determined to teach my children to have a healthy (and Godly) perspective on sex.

That’s why for !C//SEX Family Week (part of The Idea Camp blogging series), I wanted to get (and share) some advice on having this conversation with your kids. Therefore, I invited a friend of mine to share some thoughts on the subject.

Dr. Thomas Clyburn works with at-risk kids, and has seen the damage that pre-sexualization can have on young minds and emotions. I’ve asked him to share some advice on how we can have those conversations and deal with sexual issues with children…

Have you talked with your kids about sex yet? What thoughts and advice do you have on how to have that conversation?

If you’ve had to deal with pre-sexualization of your children, how did you deal with it? How do you balance healing and restoration while avoiding shame?

For more from this series, check out #ICSEX [@theideacamp blogging series].


  1. Suzie Lind

    We are beginning to have the conversations as they come up. We’ve decided to be very open and truthful with our kids in hopes the dialogue door will always be open and they will have a better understanding and make better choices.

    • @bibledude

      I really think it’s important to keep that open/honest dialog with kids. This most important thing I get from this interview is maintaining boundaries in these conversations. It’s okay to talk to the kids about sex, but they should know what is appropriate for kids vs adults.

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts Suzie! I’ll see you in Vegas!


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how (and when) to talk to the kids about sex [#ICSEX]

by Dan King time to read: 1 min